Ok, thats it, enough is enough, i laughed so hard over your damned girlfriend jokes that i spit coffee on my KB and it short circuited, im suing you for damages, see you in court.

Oh come on, you really left Ramanujan out?
Shame on you.
1+2+3+4+5+.....+ ∞ = -1/12

Actually, the original version of the joke I posted earlier is:
If you don't hit the switch, the train will run over 1 + 1 + 1 + ... = ∞
If yo do, it will run over 1 + 2 + 3 + .. which can be analytically continued to -1/12

The geometric series one is easier to understand, since the formula is taught in school (albeit with instructions that it's not valid in the case I mention without analytic continuation).

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Merry Christmas! I am glad you are here, all ! ^

My Girlfriend: "I love you!"

Me: "Is that you talking, or the wine?"

My Girlfriend: "That's me, talking to the wine."

Haha :)

The professor is having lunch in the university cafeteria. A student sits down in front of the professor without asking. The professor irritably asks: "Since some time, an eagle and a pig have dinner at the same table?" The student replies: "Okay, then I flew further"

The boy writes a letter to Santa Claus and asks him for $ 100 to make a present for his parents.

The postmen, moved by this letter, chipped in and collected $ 50, which they sent to the boy.

The boy wrote a letter of gratitude to Santa Claus: "Dear Santa Claus, thanks for the money, but next time bring it yourself, as these nasty postmen stole 50 dollars."

My girlfriend said that she needed some space. So, I locked her outside.

Then, I realized that she had the car keys when she sped away in my car with all her stuff.

I'm sure going to miss that car.

What is it called when Bethesda does an audit?

Doom Internal.

Q: What do you call it when id Software / Bethesda Softworks LLC makes a game set in western California?

A: Quake: (It's) San Andreas' Fault

A short joke:

Robin Hood fell into a stupor, meeting people of average income

Why was the chicken forced to retire from baseball?

He kept hitting fowls.

Absurd:

Two ducks are flying: a cow and a horse. One other says:
- Strange, like we are flying to the north-south, but still Thursday and Thursday

Read this in a joke book when I was a kid, never forgotten it (maybe trauma):


"What do you call a fish without an eye?

A fsh."

Last night, I gave my girlfriend a medieval battle uniform to polish while I went to the bar…





She's always said she wanted a night in, shining armor.