Posted February 10, 2016
high rated
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Day 2: Today I went to buy some grapes. It turns out that they do not sell grapes, but they were instead bags of tiny eggplants. I declined.
Day 3: Went to purchase soda. My preferred brand has been replaced with a storebrand EggPlepsi. Looked for the competing product. Also replaced with Eggplanta-Cola. Today the manager gave me the shifty eyes as I walked out again without purchasing anything.
Day 4: I was out of toilet paper and desperate, so purchased the storebrand eggplant-based toilet paper. I was confused by the options but in a rush, so went home with the single-eggply stuff. This is not absorbant. I am purple and brown from the waist down and feel nothing but shame. The eggplant-based soap was useless. Collapsed sobbing in the shower.
Day 5: I asked what was up with the eggplant based stuff on the internet. Some guy asked me what my problem was. Attempted to sob. Rubbing my eyes with eggplant-tissues caused burning and irritation.
Post edited February 10, 2016 by Wulf2k