It was the year I finally not!graduated. One of the waves of a perpetual economic crisis Russia has been in for a quarter of a century hit hard, and the state decided to combat unemployment among university graduates the only way they knew: by demanding that every hopeful graduate provide a letter of intentions from a future employer or GTFO. No letter, no diploma for you, sucker! Bwahahahaha!
(And things were further complicated by hardly anyone knowing what a letter of intentions was and what it entailed, so people were fundamentally unwilling to sign it. No crappy employer would sign the letter for the hopeful graduate in particle physics with a perfect academic record, and no decent employer would promise to hire someone who technically counted as a dropout.)
People in my dorm, also unemployed and subsisting on parents' money, played WoW. What I did was glance over their shoulders occasionally and invent a couple of stupid memes on the spot, based on what I saw.
LFP ouch and subs @ heroic, lol purplz. And then I hear that, along with the upgrade of the regular PvE server to Wrath of the Lich King, a new PvP server is going to open, a land of promise and opportunity, a realm (yet) untainted by packet editor and speed hacks, where everyone will be (temporarily) equal and rise in rank by their labors as befits a true socialist paradise! And to encourage people to move and grind, the first person to achieve level 80 (from 1, duh) would be gifted a set of A5 armor by the ever-generous administration!
Look, I don't really like the metagame of WoW. I love completing quests in a vaguely persistent world with other people present; their presence lends the quests meaning. And I wouldn't even think of cheating while at it. And so a new server where I wouldn't be looked upon as a feebleminded weirdo by legions of top-levels, at least temporarily, sounded appealing.
I signed up and started grinding quests, one by one, until no more remained in the starting area, regardless of their level or usefulness. I wasted quite some time dying in dungeons to monsters who noclipped through walls (because this was a private server - point of view, what's that?) One night (WoW's time matches ours), all alone in a desert, I was getting rid of a number of quests from an obscure and useless quest chain when the admin's voice thundered in the general chat. They were annoucing the list of players closest to the coveted A5 set. The one at the top was a level 40 lady, whom I knew to be a GM's test character.
The second closest, at level 33, was me.
I dropped the quests, 'ported to another continent, and started grinding XPs for realz.
Guildmates (I'm not particularly sociable, but those who are see the benefit of having a higher-level character join their ranks) offered to cook me food, to better recover HP and mana. (I refused, because the benefits from lower-level items decrease exponentially.) In real life, I subsisted on tea and noodles. I joined forces with my dorm mate and we pushed upwards together; during the day, they had to study, so I ran both characters. I met our enemy - a hunter with a pet tank - and ganked him. We would meet several times after that. The first in the world, we passed through the Dark Portal and, abusing a known bug, opened the convenient portal hub of Shattrath for our noobs. The
real other world - the PvE server, which naturally started at 70 and benefitted from the previous expansion's endgame loot - supplied us with hints on broken quests that were useless to pursue and fresh exploits that hadn't yet made their way into bug reports on the word of a griefed player.
In Northrend, the third and final continent, we used a known grinding spot exploit "under the cover of day" - because the GMs, unlike me, had to go to work, the lucky bastards. Then it became risky and less profitable, and we struggled to find a new one, knowing that the enemy hunter, benefitting from the same spots and much less scrutiny, was catching up, and knowing that everyone could track our location via a hacktool map, and that every secret and trick we worked hard to uncover, because we were the first, we were trailblazers, the enemy could get for free. To lift the spirits, dressed in trash grays and quest greens, the two of us won two five-man instances and looted things we couldn't even wear, while monsters fought each other due to buggy aggro and a timely application of shadow priest magic. We took time off to help the guild to level by exploiting the aggro/party system, killing low-level mobs while XP and comparatively phat loots rained on the guildmates, safely Shielded and buffed by buggy consumables I made.
We caught wind of another grinding spot, but by the time we got there, it had been already fixed to uselessness. Wandering in the snows, I found a cave of quick-spawning spiders yet lacking dangerous venom. "Train incoming!" No-cooldown spells light up the area in holy fires, the bear swipes twenty spiders with a single paw strike, and then there are only stars of loot drops shining over a mound of corpses, and the two of us, packing everything away before the next wave. We meet the hunter again; him, 73, us, having just made 77, the characters burst in golden fire of a level-up and mow him down before the fire subsides. We "grow out of" spiders and find another place in full view of Icecrown Citadel, stupidly hard to get to because of bugged elite mobs standing guard, but the druid can now fly and ferry loot to the vendor, and nothing is a barrier for the free spirit of a dead priest.
"Hey Ever, I know you like the monastery, wanna help us farm
the hat?" Sure, just wait a bit, I'll be free in a while.
, really. [url=http://www.wowwiki.com/Soon#Blizzard.27s_Official_Definition_of_Soon]<i>How soon</i>, they ask.
When? You'll see, I say. Just... a... couple... trains... and... you... will... see.............
MOTHERFUCKING DING. (can we has hats?)
(No, not yet, there's still the other character.)
Aaaaaaand DING.
(ok lets farm teh hat nao guise)
There are other stories. Like that one time a friend's guild got raided by a jerk and we decided to create a character of the same class in that guild and help it skyrocket in levels just to spite that one guy, and a friend-turned-rival guild of powerlevelers decided we were out to challenge
them, and we really
had to challenge them so as not to lose face, because no one ever backs off like rational adults in WoW, and we shared all our secrets with them so it was a really hard time going, and my laptop nearly fried and I had to actually keep it in my lap so that it wouldn't overheat, and I composed a song about the occasion and sang it (macroed it out, really) in General, and we eventually made peace with that rival guild, on condition of me pretty please not singing that song in their presence, and then we went white-hat-but-not-really and fought real money extorters and collected evidence and faked missing evidence to get them banned,
all is fair in Love and Warcraft, and we cheated our way through dozens of dungeons to dozens of achievements,
ha, who cares that we failed that one time, let them think we're mortal, and then there's a sad story about how I nearly got RL-murdered, but all of that seriously pales before the golden light of level 80.
And my best
non-game achievement is winning the Autumn Express, but it will have to wait until another giveaway.
Love and purplz,
--me.