Lifthrasil: Broadly speaking the source of my 'personal problem' is love ... or the end thereof. And a depression related to the end of something I thought to be eternal.
So... first, that's actually
not bad. As in, it's a problem that is personal and thus theoretically solvable and not something that is going down the shitter and dragging you with it, like the economy or the state of gay rights in Russia.
Second, "time heals" and the like grossly mispresents the math for the recovery. You are NOT going to magically get better just because time has passed. Rather, you have a
chance of getting better
per a given period of time (depending on what you do). That's kind of a double-edged blessing, because, on one hand, your two months of uninterrupted suffering do NOT actually project to years and years of the same, and on the other hand, there's nothing you can do that will directly bring noticeable relief. Sorry about that.
Meanwhile, something you
can do is
taking up a hobby. Normally, I'd suggest cycling, but
you know, duh. Ideally, the hobby should be:
- financially and organizationally autonomous. Do not pay to be temporarily entertained. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT throw your money at the problem. Eviction does not help in cases of heartbreak. Plus, if you shared a household with your ex, you WILL run into money problems even if you were the primary (or the only) breadwinner (unless you're filthy rich, in which case I guarantee your problems will vanish if you buy me winter clothes, wink wink nudge nudge).
(Note: this is not the same as an investment. Practically every hobby requires an initial investment and the associated risk. But don't directly pay for your mind to be taken off troubles for a specified period of time.)
- involve other random people. It's easier to socialize when you're doing something together. Warning: some of the people you meet may be assholes. Don't open up, share your problems or try to get close with them. If you're not "in" for the hobby itself, find another one.
- droppable and, err, pickable-up where you left it at your leisure; not depend on your mandatory participation. Always showing up is difficult even when you're not depressed, and feeling ashamed for not showing up and having to invent an excuse and consequently dropping the hobby altogether is supremely counterproductive.
- creative or otherwise implement personal achievements, so you could look back and say "I did X" or "I got remarkably awesome-er at X".
Bad advice:
"Don't worry, they were a bitch anyway, how lucky of you to have found out sooner than later". Uhm no. They have become an asshole through the same catastrophic math that governs your chance of recovery.
"A good life is the sweetest revenge". Always looking back to find out how much exactly in
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taylor_Swift]Swifts you are "over" that person isn't going to help at all.
and the opposite, "They'll come back crawling on their knees". What the fucking fuck.
"Go on a trip", "go to the movies", "get shitfaced". See above for autonomy.
"Socialize more". Hahahahaha oh lawl.
"Man up" (if you're a dude) / "[newage bullshit]" (if you're a lady). FFFUUUUUU--.
"Get a dog/cat/potted plant/tamagotchi (are those still around)?" That depends on how deep in shit you currently are, whether you actually want a pet, and how active the community is.
Don't take up extra personal responsibility. "Volunteer! You'll feel super worthy and awesome when you're helping people!" No. See above for mandatory participation. You'll burn out and your guardian angel will be too busy getting shitfaced in Disneyland to appear. Volunteering is recommended for bored healthy hipsters, and normal people take it up just because they want to.
(If you do decide to take up cycling, get a Trek CrossRip or a Specialized Sirrus and meet me in Paris in 2019.)
(What do you have against SHODAN? I'll be all for her conquering the world.)
