Posted June 11, 2010
Valve cancels E3's press conference:
http://www.incgamers.com/News/23273/valves-e3-surprise-is--there-is-no-surprise
I am really disappointed, but can't expect much of Valve recently.
Here is something for lightening up:
It is E3:
Gabe is lifted onto stage via large crane.
Crowd gasps in excitement, they're on the edge of their seats, everyone starts sweating.
"I'm really sorry about the wait for the next installment of Half-Life. Really and truly. We've messed up the whole concept of "episodic content" by taking so long to release a new game. And today, I'm here to announce that the fine folks here at Valve have finally made some real progress. That's right."
Gabe grins and pauses to look over the crowd, which is now writhing with anticipation as various people look as if they're about to leap out of their chair.
"Yes, we're finally announcing... Half-Life 2: Episode 3: Chapter 1!!"
...wat
"By dividing our Episodes into "Chapters" as we will now call them, we'll be able to release Episode 3 in hour long segments for $10 a piece over the next 5 years."
Crowd is completely silent.
"Also, Left 4 Dead 3: Episode 1."
Massive riots, police can't do shit, Miyamoto killed in riots, 3DS and PS4 Prototypes are destroyed.
E3 disbands forever.
http://www.incgamers.com/News/23273/valves-e3-surprise-is--there-is-no-surprise
I am really disappointed, but can't expect much of Valve recently.
Here is something for lightening up:
It is E3:
Gabe is lifted onto stage via large crane.
Crowd gasps in excitement, they're on the edge of their seats, everyone starts sweating.
"I'm really sorry about the wait for the next installment of Half-Life. Really and truly. We've messed up the whole concept of "episodic content" by taking so long to release a new game. And today, I'm here to announce that the fine folks here at Valve have finally made some real progress. That's right."
Gabe grins and pauses to look over the crowd, which is now writhing with anticipation as various people look as if they're about to leap out of their chair.
"Yes, we're finally announcing... Half-Life 2: Episode 3: Chapter 1!!"
...wat
"By dividing our Episodes into "Chapters" as we will now call them, we'll be able to release Episode 3 in hour long segments for $10 a piece over the next 5 years."
Crowd is completely silent.
"Also, Left 4 Dead 3: Episode 1."
Massive riots, police can't do shit, Miyamoto killed in riots, 3DS and PS4 Prototypes are destroyed.
E3 disbands forever.
Post edited June 11, 2010 by Tantrix