Sarisio: a) 1 STR is exaggeration just to show the point. Pacifistic approach isn't possible in CRPGs just like in Strategy, Shooters, etc. It simply goes against the core of the genre - killing big bad dragons and such.
I simply don't like aforementioned "level tuning" and multiple ways to solve quests. It usually means that only one way is the most rewarding and I don't want to gimp my characters, especially when game features no respawn. Even if game is otherwise easy, it just goes against my nature.
b) I like it when game is open about its rules instead of surprising me with bad mechanics like "If you'd talk your way out of this situation, you'd get 10 times more Exp" or "this character triggered timed quest when joined your party, fail to do it and you lose that character [true for most of recruitable characters]". Such games make me browse Internet in search of walkthroughs to avoid potential frustration, and before I am there I am already playing some other game.
c) Difficulty modes undervalue accomplishment and world and allow for cheesing. CRPGs already have "difficulty modifier" it is called leveling. If people want easier game but don't want to "grind", they have to deal with it. I like to play fighting games casually, but I understand that I need a lot of practice ("grind") to feel comfortable with combos in different combat situations. I like strategies, but I understand that I need to spend time learning which strategic approach is the most reliable. And so on. if people don't want to deal with that, there are cheat codes (nothing wrong about cheating).
d) That is to make the line between tabletop gaming and video games. "C" stands for "Computer/Console". And if to look at history of CRPGs, all the first CRPGs were about numbers, leveling and doing things for loot and XP. Not "some" of CRPGs, ALL of them. What was frowned upon in tabletop gaming ("Monty Haul" campaigns) was a baseline expectation from CRPGs. On other side, Computers allow modeling of very elaborated worlds, dungeons and character progress systems, something which is far beyond the possibilities of tabletop campaigns.
In other words CRPGs don't have anything in common with role-playing and tabletop games except the name.
Again: The questions is NOT about CRPG, but about RPG.
But in order.
a) Not all CRPG are about killing the big bad dragon. Maybe all you like are, but not all. Planescape: Torment is not about killing the big bad Dragon, and it's one of the best CRPG ever.
b) Your example is just bad game design. In effect, a "talker" should get approximately as much XP as the "fighter". And yes, I hate timed quests too, except when they really make sense, story-wise, and thus add to the atmosphere of urgency. In this case the game designer has to make sure you can beat the quest when you encounter it - otherwise: bad design.
c) So, just because you don't like it, nobody should have it? Also, grinding and practice are different things. You learn something with practice, develop your skills. Grinding is doing the same thing over and over that you already can do - just to see some numbers go up. It's work, actually.
Also I personally don't like cheating. It destroys every sense of accomplishment. I'd rather honestly beat a game on easy than cheat my way through hard. But I don't condemn people who use cheats (except in MP).
d) See first sentence. And as I've previously written, those old CRPG are not "RPG" in the true sense. They simulators of RPG rulesets. Of course computers are perfect for managing lots of numbers. And that's what the early CRPG did. The worlds weren't very elaborate those games either. Just stickmen, text and numbers.
But RPGs have come a long way since then, and they're trying to emulate the "real thing" more. Of course it will take a long time until an interactivity like with a real human DM will be possible, maybe this will never happen.
The old games were all "mechanics", but take for instance Witcher 3: Lower the difficulty and you have a story based game which you can heavily influence. But you don't have to care about how you spend your points and getting the best recipes and equipment that much. Set it to hard and the mechanics become more prominent: you will spend more time thinking about how to develop your character, get max damage, find the optimal weapons and armour and the best recipes, otherwise it's gonna be real tough.
Your ideal RPG is obviously a lot about numbers you can manage. My ideal RPG is about role-playing - and the more the numbers are hidden from me, the better. That doesn't mean they shouldn't be there, just it's the computer's part to keep track of them - not mine.